a parenting moment

When 2010 clicked over to 2011 lots of folks were making Top Ten lists.  Sarah and I were pondering what top ten parenting books we’d recommend to new parents or parents with small children (like ourselves).  Here’s our list.  What would you add?

1. Happiest Baby on the Block – seriously, the 5 S’s saved all of our lives (swaddling, side/stomach position, shushing sounds, swinging, sucking)
2. The Baby Book by Dr. Sears – and anything by the Sears family – the basics, great primer for attachment parenting
3. Siblings without Rivalry - yes, yes you can.
4. Raising your Spirited Child – for the kids who are MORE of everything!  Transitions, transitions, transitions…
5. Relationship Empowerment Parenting – We had the Balswicks for a class at Fuller.  Big takeaway – parent like scaffolding…
6. Myth of the Perfect Mother – not just for moms, we’ve seriously messed up the notion of what mothering is and can be.  This book helps frame the question and offers a new perspective.
7. No-Cry Sleep Solution – big thanks to the Odens for recommending this.  You DO NOT have to let kids “cry it out” – it ain’t healthy, normal, or more godly to do so.
8. Attachment Parenting – like I said, we’re big Dr. Sears fans.
9. Positive Discipline for Preschoolers – discipline is about learning, not power or punishment.
10. Growing Strong Daughters – got girls?  Read this.

Introducing the newest Klinefelter – Elizabeth Joann – born St. Patrick’s Day, March 17, 2010 and weighing in at 9 lbs., 20.75 in. She’s doing great and we are slowly adjusting to life with 3 kids and even less sleep!

Quite possibly, this is who I want to be when I grow up!  Click above and read.

Gladys (Brown) Klinefelter, known as Gladdy, departed her earthly life on March 9, 2008 surrounded by her family, at home in Berea, KY after a courageous twenty five year struggle with Parkinson Disease.  She is survived by her husband of 60 years, the Rev. Gerald Klinefelter.  At Red Bird Mission for 32 years, they worked as a team, spreading God’s Love to the people of eastern Kentucky. She enjoyed Kentucky hills and creeks. She gave nursing care, hair cuts, lead community social activities; taught art, drama, and 4-H to school kids.  She is survived by 2 brothers, 4 children, 7 grandchildren, 5 great grandchildren and numerous nieces and nephews. Memorials can be sent to Red Bird Mission, 70 Queendale Center, Beverly, KY 40913

“I am only going over Jordan ”
Jennifer sings on the CD player
Mom breaths are erratic and
she gasps every now and then.
Her skin has a bluish tint.
Connie, Nancy and I are
holding her hands and touching her head.
She stops gasping and breathing.
The CD player sings
” I’m going to lay down my burdens.
Down by the river side. ”

It was a joy for mom to do her work.
Her work was not a burden.
Parkinson Disease was the monster
that robbed her of all the things
that she liked to do, including work.
Living a good life with a monster, on her back was her burden.

That burden now sits on the river bank
and Mom has crossed over ‘Jordan’.
I can see her, sitting with her feet
in a small creek, on her side of the ‘Jordan’.
Enjoy the song of the creek, the rocks
it flows over, and the flowers waving in the wind under the trees on the creek bank.

The hand I hold grows cold
Mom is gone.
I shall be sad
and she shall be
free of her burden.

It is normal for us to be sad
and logic tells us that
we should be happy for her freedom.

Gladdy (Brown) Klinefelter (my Grandma) died 11:00 am Sunday March 9, 2008

Here we are at the beginning of 2008 and, I must admit, I’m very excited.  I anticipate that 2008 will be a year of new beginnings, hope, and change.  Chief of those for me is the dream of a new community of faith birthing in Cincinnati.  So how do we get there?  What are the first steps?  How does this all work with the rest of a full life?  What is the “time-table”?  Good questions.  I certainly don’t pretend to think these sorts of things “just happen”.  I’m reminded of Dallas Willard’s helpful little acronym V.I.M. from Renovation of the Heart (link to article about VIM).  Applied to church planting it looks like this:  What is the Vision of life in the Kingdom for this neighborhood?  What do we Intend to do in birthing this new community of faith?  What are our Means by which to accomplish our intended church plant?

Honestly, I feel like I’ve been held up in my articulation of these things for a deeper reason.  True, life has been full these last few weeks of holidays, small children, and a lingering cold that fills my head with too much mucus – but I think I’ve been stymied by an unseen specter of “You’ve got to get this just right”.  I’m going to do my best to ignore those voices in my head and just try to tell it as I see it….

The Vision of life in the Kingdom for this neighborhood is one that lives within the heart of an actual community of faith.  A small community of 150 folks or so that intentionally follow Jesus together.  The Kingdom of God – or to borrow Greg Boyd’s phrase, “the dome in which God is King” – is evident in this community of faith as a sign pointing the way and illuminating Emmanuel, “Christ with us”.  It is evident as this community works together and with others to bring the Kingdom  – God’s extravagant Grace and Reconciling Love – to bear in our homes, streets, schools, and workplaces.  It is evident as this community lives its life together in the Way of Christ, loving the least, the last, and the lost.  Kingdom life is a life lived in accord with one another and with the Triune God.  Simply put, we envision a community of faith living a Kingdom-life together.  And just to be clear (because I don’t want “Kingdom” to sound jargon-y), “Kingdom” means that “dome in which God is king”, in that “dome” is a life of deep grace, true love, and real peace.  But, it is not a Utopian, pie-in-the-sky life, but a life lived in concert with the Creator and Sustainer.  Kingdom-life takes suffering seriously, believes that healing is real, and works towards reconciliation with God, humanity, and creation.

We Intend to birth a new community of faith in Cincinnati.  This community of faith would a People of God on God’s Kingdom Mission in our neighborhoods, homes, schools, and workplaces.  We would be a Jesus-centered community.  We would be a real community – in that we would intentionally live our lives together (not just see each other once a week at a religious gathering).  We would “do life together” – in our neighborhoods, in mentoring relationships, in small groups/house churches, and in larger corporate gatherings and projects.  We would be around 150 people who would meet together weekly to worship together.  We would meet throughout the week in one another’s homes, coffeeshops, bars, and chili parlors.  We would live within proximity of one another and share food and resources (and childcare).  [There are questions here, I'm sure.... how is this different than Vineyard Central?  And what is our current/future relationship with VC?  Why 150?  What happens if we get to 151?  Would we pay staff/pastor/leaders?  Would we buy a building, own property, rent/lease/borrow space to worship?  Who let the dogs out? I'm not going to address these questions here, but they are all things I've spent time considering.  Leave a comment or send an email and I'll address the ones that you are curious about or ask me other questions]

The Means by which we accomplish this intended church plant are as followed (based on current standings):
1.  Pray (something I want to get better at doing)
2.  Write out Vision, Mission, Values, and relevant Issues pertaining to church planting (so as to facilitate being on the same page!) and complete New Church Plan for RCA
3.  Propose intention to our House Church
4.  Enter a month of sabbatical and prayer as a House Church to discern next steps
5.  Form a planting team of folks committed to seeing the new community birthed
6.  Initiate an advisory board of wise folks to help us navigate the waves and decisions of the first year

Well, that’s all I got right now.  Sarah just got home and I want to post this and email it some folks (I suspect my readership is way down).  Peace.

So, we’ve been organizing pictures (for the purpose of Christmas cards and gifts) and we made an album of Klinefelter Family pictures of this past year.  Click above to enjoy.

Most of the dreaded Christmas presents are purchased.  I say “dreaded” because I highly dislike the stress that gift buying produces.  I actually like giving gifts for people, it is just a bit anti-climatic when you are buying for people who really don’t “need” anything (that would be most folks we know… which is really a sad commentary on who we know).  Anyway, like I said, we’re almost finished.  We’re yet to write the Christmas letter, but hopefully tomorrow.  I’ll probably post it here once it has been completed.

The semester finished today with a collective sigh heard around the campus.  I feel like I’ve collapsed into to the Christmas break.  I love what I do and have enjoyed a wonderful semester teaching and working with the students and my colleagues.  It is so much fun to watch the students learn and grow as young people becoming adults!  This year I’m honored to teach a Chapel Leadership class for students who plan, organize, and produce our weekly Chapels.  It is a great group of students who love Jesus and earnestly desire to see the student body engage with God in worship.  They are a joy to teach.  Cisco, computer networking, has been good too – we’re behind in the curriculum, but that’s ok we’ll catch up.  I’ve got a wonderful group of student aides working with me this year too – they have been invaluable as we tackle the many technological developments of this year.  And in the midst of all this goodness…. well, it is still school and it is good to take a break and rest.

Unfortunately, my rest will be tempered a bit with the lingering list of things I didn’t finish but need to before the start of next semester (Jan. 2nd).  We need to get the computer lab re-imaged and, though we worked on it all week, one technical difficulty after another has beset us.  I think one evening next week should take care of the job though…. I hope.  I also have grading to do, but that won’t take too long.

Lastly, I’m hopeful that after a few days of rest I can work on articulating church planting mission, vision, and the like.  I have a sense that 2008 is going to be a big year for our Kingdom work and I want to be ready.

Sarah is in a new job now which means she is gone Sunday-Thursday evenings. Eventually she’ll work 8-midnight, but these three weeks she has been in training from 6-10 PM. Thankfully the wee-ones go to bed around 7:00, but that hour and a half from the time she leaves till bed time is a challenge. Happily tonight I had enough energy left to pick up around the house, write a blog post, and hopefully read a bit (oh, and maybe work on a puzzle).

I’m reading these 2 books:

Here are some quotables:

From The Open Secret, p. 34 – “The reign of God is not a new “movement” in which those interested may enlist.  It is not a cause for support, a cause that might succeed or fail according to the amount of support it attracts.  It is, to be precise, the reign of God, the fact that God whom Jesus knows as Father is the sovereign ruler of all peoples and all things.  The announcement means that htis fact is no longer something remote – far up in the heavens or far away in the future.  It is an impending reality, in fact, the one great reality that confronts men and women wit the need for decision.”

From Counterfeit Community, p. 21 – “Community is organic, not contractual or artificial.  In a sense it is a living organism that is continually changing and adapting to challenges in the environment.  …  The degree to which community develops is ultimately dependent upon the nature of the social, economic, and political fabric of a group of people.  Community is not formed by people who get together and agree to sign their names to a document to form a community; rather, it is created over time as people form connections with each other, develop trust and respect for each other, and create a sense of common purpose.”

Ok, that’ll do for now.  Good night all.

Want to understand your teen? Look online – Opinion – USATODAY.com

I’m also wondering what are some good (actual, not theoretical) uses of social networking tools for church planting and discipleship.

Thrive blog
RCA Church Planters blog
RCA Thrive description

I’m tired…. about to go to bed, but I am very excited about going.  Just getting away from Cincinnati for bit will be good.